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Chosen One Of The Day: Lupi from 'Transylvania 6-5000'

Contributed by
Mar 4, 2018

The 1985 comedy Transylvania 6-5000 is full of wacky spins on classic horror characters like the Wolf Man, Frankenstein's monster, the Mummy, and Dracula. But it's a scene-stealing servant who snatches this movie away from the likes of Jeff Goldblum, Ed Begley Jr., and Michael Richards. So today we toast masterful comedienne Carol Kane, who made the most out of the role of a hurtful hunchback's worshipful wife.

Lupi is a woman of deep love and maniacal passion. She's perfectly content working for a mad scientist and living in a bizarre castle with creatures chained up in the basement, as long as it means she can work side by side her husband Radu (John Byner). Parted for mere moments, she pines, "Did you miss me?" Thwarted from kissing him, she hopefully chimes, "Maybe laaaaaaaaater!" Ever devoted, she declares, "Your work is my work … your time is my time!"

Yet for all her devotion, Radu spends most of the movie rebuffing her affections and help. It's not like he's some prize. He's a weasel-like stooge for the unhinged Dr. Malavaqua (Joseph Bologna), and painfully reverential to everyone except for his wife, calling every other character his "master." Radu should wake up and smell the window spray, because his wife may be clingy, but she's also a total catch.

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Her heart is as big as the Loch Ness Monster. She's got the '80s flair of a young Madonna, bringing some Material Girl to quaint Transylvania. And perhaps best of all, she's got the kooky and coquettish appeal of Carol Kane! What more could you want, Radu!?

Thankfully, this prickly pair seem to get a happy ending. When their hunched child is mocked, Radu stands up not only for their son but also his wife. And it seems at last Lupi might get the love she deserves. (But we'll still be rooting for her to run off with Jeff Goldblum, because duh.)