Putting the sham in shamanic

Contributed by
Mar 15, 2005
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My wife brought home a booklet she picked up yesterday. Titled "Holistic Happenings" she left it out on the table so I'd see it. I sometimes think she's trying to induce me into a coronary so she can reap the hundreds of dollars of my life insurance.

Anyway, I sat down over my bowl of generic-brand Cocoa Krispies and started reading the rag. I was expecting it to be silly, but my oh my. I nearly choked on my cereal.

There's a column in the back for something called "Shamanic Astrology". You can imagine how I felt about that. The guru of this particular New Age, uh, stuff, had this to say:

"Wholeness is awakening to your shadow as well as your light, balancing the upper, lower, and middle worlds, and integrating your past lineage with your future soul intention. "

If you can understand what he's trying to say there, seek help. And not the shamanic kind.

Normally, I don't make fun of stuff like this, but c'mon. That sentence is meaningless. It sounds deep, but it doesn't say anything. It's content-free. It's the celery stick of philosophy.

I know, I know-- I live in Northern California, and I should expect such nonsense to pervade the culture. But it's frustrating anyway. And I also know it's not restricted to this area, it's all over this country. Red state, blue state, this kind of fuzzy thinking can be found everywhere.

Do me a favor folks. I don't care if you agree with me or not, but just do this one little thing: think. Think clearly. That's all you need to do. As I like to say, the Universe is cool enough without having to make up garbage about it.

P.S. I have a general astrology debunking I'll be unleashing on the website soon. Stay Tuned.