star wars the last jedi porg

Watching Rian Johnson take a knife to this porg is traumatizing

Contributed by
Feb 22, 2018

Porgs are friends, not food. (Unless it's this yummy porg pop.) Director Rian Johnson might've created the adorable creatures from The Last Jedi -- who have built a nest in our hearts (and on the Millennium Falcon) -- but Johnson recently stunned the members of Porg Nation by cutting one of them up into little pieces.

This week at a Disney party to celebrate The Last Jedi, the writer/director of the film and creator of #PorgNation was given a pretty stunning (and realistic) porg-shaped cake. You might have assumed that Johnson is pro-porg, considering Chewie was guilted into leaving the porgs uneaten in his film, but alas, that's apparently not the case, as Johnson stunningly took a knife to the poor cake, traumatizing porg lovers all over the galaxy.

Naturally, the ritual sacrifice was documented and posted on Johnson's Instagram. Take a look:

social-media

Johnson did repeatedly say "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." while cutting through the brain of the porg. Which seemed sort of comforting, because at least he felt terrible about the situation. But then he proceeded to behead the innocent creature before plunging the knife directly through the porg's cakey belly.

We get it, porgs are so adorable you could eat them. But it doesn't mean you should! And it doesn't mean they deserve to be sliced up so barbarically. At the very least, have the decency to make it as painless for them as possible.

Sweet dreams of beheaded porgs, friends.

(via io9)