You know how they say the best gifts are the ones given from the heart or hand-made with love? To hell with that. We want over-the-top, excessive and downright filthy-rich presents, and we want them right now.
Check out 13 sci-fi luxury gifts for the rich, super-rich and ultra-rich that we probably won't be getting this holiday season. But we can dream, can't we?
Elektra Coffee Machine
This coffee machine isn't a mere caffeine delivery system; this is the coffee machine Jules Verne would have used. And according to obsessive and overstimulated coffee bloggers, it's one of the best espresso machines out there. If you wonder why this item is here, take a look at that photo. Even the smallest of these machines are objects of steampunk art. And you deserve better than Starbucks.
Price tag: $1,349-$15,000
Will diamond dice increase your chances of rolling critical hits? Who cares? They're dice made out of freakin' diamonds, with gold spots to boot. They'll scratch your glass surfaces, and they'll make your friends mock your extravagance. But none of that matters. No matter what you roll with diamond dice, you always win.
Price tag: $15,000 (upon request)
Retro Arcade Machine
Pinel et Pinel are luxury bag and luggage makers, so when they make a trunk, they mean business. But they mixed business with pleasure when they created this Arcade 80s Trunk, with 60 retro games, like Pac-Man. What they managed to come up with looks like a 1980s arcade machine designed by a chic Italian shoemaker.
Price tag: $18,800 (prices fluctuate)
Personalized Trip to Tokyo
The Artisans of Leisure specialize in luxury tours, personalized to your tastes. Frommer's Travel Guide? Lonely Planet? If you must. But then you wouldn't have their car service, their personal guide ... and special access to maid cafes, video game parlors, Akihabara, Harijuku and the hard-to-access Studio Ghibli Museum.
Price tag: Almost $20,000
This Tron-inspired motorcycle is eye-catching, street-legal and a sure-fire conversation piece, although it sadly lacks its own techno soundtrack. It won't send you to the Grid, but it will take you to the grocery store in style (unless it's raining).
Price tag: $35,000
Robby the Robot
Robby the Robot stole the show in the 1956 movie Forbidden Planet, and he has enough acting credits to make the guy waiting your table jealous. But this guy is a professional. When he's not menacing your cat with his "servo-controlled head" and his "his planetary gyro stabilizers," he can double as a sound system. (It totally beats waiting tables, Robbie.)
Price tag: $50,000
Imagine the delight on the little children's faces on Christmas morning when you lead them to the window. They're eager as they anticipate a new sled, or perhaps even a bicycle. Now imagine the screams of horror as they're greeted with the open maw of a Tyrannosaurus Rex. You can bask in the knowledge that even at that price, it was all totally worth it.
Price tag: $51,000 (prices fluctuate)
You can copy the design of any old watch, but you can't copy Romain Jerome. That's because he uses steel from the Apollo 11 to create his "Moon Dust DNA" watches (other watches include steel from the Titanic). To make them even more exclusive than they already are, he's issuing only 1969 of them.
Price tag: $50,000-$200,000
Nobody needs a mummy. But who wouldn't want one? It isn't a conversation piece, it's a museum piece! And it's wrapped in its original linen! Considering it's an historical object, it can be yours rather inexpensively. The sarcophagus—which is even older than the mummy itself—costs extra, but frankly, you wouldn't want the one without the other.
(Although it's illegal to keep remains of the dead in your home, there must be some sort of clause that makes it okay to house your great-grandparent to the 20th degree.)
Price tag: $165,000 for the mummy; $85,000 for the sarcophagus
Willow Garage PR2 Robot
It's so hard to find good servants these days. That's where the Willow Garage PR2 Robot comes in. With help from the open source robotics community, we can order the PR2 to do all of the unusual chores that would otherwise get us sued for human rights violations. It's hard to think of them as our potential robot overlords when they're folding our undies.
Price tag: $400,000
Until now, the best way to watch television was on a 102-inch screen, but that's way too working class. Now Panasonic is giving us the TH-152UX1, a full 152 inches of HD 3D TV (or at least will be, when it's released in January) that will deliver Supernatural the way it should be seen. All you need is a mansion to put it in.
Price tag: $500,000
This personal submarine is a wonderful way to explore 1,000 feet below the ocean's surface. It even has strobe lights, to capture those secret underwater moments. But it's best use is for those times you need a quick getaway from your secret underwater lair.
Price tag: $2 million
Trip to the International Space Station
Remember the luxury trip to Japan we just recommended? Forget it. It's too stultifying and Earth-bound. Space Adventures will broker your trip to the International Space Station. For 10 days, you get to eat, sleep and live like an astronaut, but without all the work. Oh, did we say just over a week? What we meant was six months of procedures and Russian language training first.
Price tag: $30 million