21 scandalous secrets revealed on WookieLeaks

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Marc Bernardin
Dec 14, 2012

Every large organization has those things it'd rather keep from the rank and file, be it the Galactic Empire, the Rebellion or the Jedi Academy—and thanks to the latest Twitter meme, here are the juiciest Star Wars secrets to come down the pike.

@StuartPownall: Stormtrooper armour to be investigated after recent firefight leaves no survivors.

@MaxReboYouKnow: Death Star construction oversight committee recognized vulnerable defense point in exhaust port, considered it "secure"

@deathspal Series of Droid mutilations baffle storm troopers. "Their arms are just ripped clean off" Said one trooper

@dclas: Leaked memos re: Bespin mining colony raid prove Calrissian did in fact have choice.

@InfinityLounge: No female officer present during interview of Princess Leia on Death Star. Amnesty International "concerned"

@mcjellyjamz: Admiral Ackbar was in fact briefed about the trap long before the fatal attack.

@monkeyflungpoo: Mos Eisley Space Port security officials admit to ethnic profiling, and enhanced patdowns of Sand People.

@deathspal: Ballistics report show Greedo's gun never fired

@miked0273: Jedi order covers up vigilante apprentice's murderous spree in Sand People village. Women and children slaughtered.

@shamusyoung: High-ranking member of Emperor Palpatine's staff has fathered an illegitimate son on Tatooine.

@InfinityLounge: Public support of Clone War wanes and considered a "damn fool idealistic crusade"

@archon: Diplomatic cables prove that Darth Vader never intended to honor terms of deal with Lando Calrissian.

@jamesseddon: Chewbacca privately told rebel leaders that Yoda was 'out of his depth'.

@vegasjosef: Report of destruction of Alderaan was to make way for a new hyperspace bypass is a government covert cover-up

@bryanQmiller: Leia knew

@shizoor: Admiral Tarkin denies Death Star plans were leaked to the Rebel Alliance, "I think you overestimate their chances."

@_backslash: No Bothans actually died to bring us this information.

@cragjagged: Galactic Empire leader The Emperor relies heavily on his long-time Twi'lek nurse, described as "voluptuous and blue"

@arconic: Biggs Darklighter was shot down by Friendly Fire

@paulclammer: Princess Leia arrested & denied bail; extradition to Death Star likely.

@cbarbour: General Veers exaggerated battle experience. Wore medals he had not earned. Apparently did not earn the medal of honor.

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