6 superheroes who got their powers from being lousy scientists

Contributed by
Dec 17, 2012

For most of us, causing a brutal accident at the workplace means yet another week standing in the unemployment line on crutches. But for some superhero scientists, injuring themselves due to their own sloppy work gave them superpowers instead.

Check out six scientists-turned-superheroes who would probably get fired from a normal research job.

The Flash (Barry Allen)

His Origin: The picture says it all:

Now, we can't really blame him for standing next to the window. He's in a police lab, so he doesn't really get much choice in the matter, probably. But who opens the window during a lightning storm (and don't say "Ben Franklin")?

Then it happened again to his nephew. Allen's not the best nanny, either.

Somehow, this lightning hits a bunch of "electrified" chemicals. Frankly, it doesn't matter if they were electrified before, they are going to be electrified after lightning hits them. But we wouldn't expect a chemist to know that. Nor would we expect them too wear a lab coat that could, you know, repel chemical spills. However, then Allen would've just been another lightning victim. They don't make lab coats that repel that.

Dr. Manhattan

His Origin: Rushing into an intrinsic field generator for something he left inside his lab coat, Dr. Jon Osterman is disintegrated, then reintegrates himself with godlike powers.

And of every possible outfit he could have created, he went with "Black Speedo"

First of all, he's a scientist at a highly regarded research facility: Is it too much to ask to hang up your coat? Instead, he leaves his coat and pocketwatch inside the research chamber, moments before it was to be used. If Osterman hadn't returned to get his stuff, who knows what it would've done to the machine? Possibly we'd have a coat-and-pocketwatch with amazing powers? Or maybe it would just short out the machine and Osterman would be justifiably fired. Leaving stuff in the test area is like spitting in your research chemicals. This was negligent, but what is even more negligent is that the door automatically shuts on him and can't be opened up again.

It's a safety feature?!

If you're a scientist working on a chamber of agonizing death, it might be a good idea to insert a secondary safety protocol. Like, maybe a buzzer can sound a few seconds before the door closes? Or perhaps the scientists in charge of this experiment just assumed none of them would be so sloppy as to leave multiple personal effects in the active testing area.

The Incredible Hulk

His Origin: Bruce Banner runs onto a gamma bomb testing facility to save a trespassing teen. He shoves the teen into a ditch, but gets hit with the full powers of radiation.

Note in the pic above that it says Banner was miles from the detonation of the bomb. So the bomb is powerful enough to mess up a guy miles away. Yet they didn't think to put up a fence?

Protected trench ain't gonna save you, kid, you need a fridge

Why are there guards? Aren't the guards going to get hit with the gamma radiation? Also, if we're going to be testing radiation bombs, can we put up some signs and get a little more clearance from humans than one mile? John Wayne died from cancer caused by appearing in a film that was in a different state from bomb testing.

Susan Storm, Reed Richards and Ben Grimm

Their Origin: Angry at The Man for canceling their space flight, they hijack a rocket and joyride into the unknown.

Okay, Ben Grimm wasn't exactly a scientist. But he was an astronaut in training, which apparently means you steal a spaceship the first time somebody calls you chicken. When the government threatens to cancel their space mission, Scientists Susan Storm and Reed Richards decide to go rogue. We'd have sought funding from the private sector before taking an untested craft, you know, into freakin' space.

Economists often state it was a lack of superpowers that doomed communism

So, also, out in space there's some weird "cosmic rays." None of the scientists are sure what they are or what they do. Still, the group decides it would be a great idea to bring along Susan's teenage brother, just for kicks.

Luckily someone left the keys in the ignition

Had they not rocked the planet by becoming the Fan Four, we imagine these scientists would have returned to charges of grand theft shuttle and taking a minor across planetary lines.

These examples stress the importance of getting quality test subjects for experimental science tests. If Dr. Frankenstein had simply tried to reanimate dead lab rats, he might be remembered as the man who cured death.

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