**Spoiler Warning: There are spoilers for American Horror Story: Apocalypse in the recap below**
In This Episode...
Tensions are, unsurprisingly, high in the latest episode of AHS Apocalypse, "The Morning After." Langdon brings with him distrust. He announces that he will be conducting interviews to decide who will go with him to The Sanctuary. Gallant goes first and he comes on to Langdon, who rejects him — until the Rubber Man (you remember him from AHS: Murder House) comes to Gallant's room for sex. A mysterious infestation of snakes invades the bunker, and between that and the Rubber Man, Venable and Mead think that Langdon is responsible for the breaches in protocol. However, when Emily and Timothy find Langdon's computer — with recent emails — in his room, they discover that Venable made up the rule about abstinence. The Cooperative found this out, and Venable making her own rules is punishable by death.
This does not prevent Venable and Mead from exacting punishment against their guests. When Evie finds Rubber Man screwing her grandson, she tattles to Mead, hoping that taking out any competition will yield a better chance for her to get into The Sanctuary. Mead and Venable whip Gallant, but stop when they discover he likes it too much. Later, Langdon swears to Gallant that he "wouldn't f*** him if he was the last man on Earth — and you very nearly are." When the Rubber Man returns to Gallant's room for some more loving, Gallant takes charge — and grabs a pair of scissors, stabbing the Rubber Man violently to death. Only problem: Langdon is standing in the doorway. And when Gallant looks back, he has been stabbing his grandmother.
Bye bye, Joan Collins
I am extremely disappointed that she has been killed off. Granted, in AHS, no one is really dead, but she was the only likable character in the whole group. Seriously. Evie was a horrible woman: rich and privileged and a name-dropper of the highest regard. But at least she knew what she was doing. She was aware of all of this, admitted to it, and embraced it. I respect that. Also, she wasn't a whiner. While Coco was whining about being served snake stew, Evie related a story about eating a delicious snake stew at a royal dinner with Gina Lollobrigida. RIP Evie.
Apparently, Andre isn't dead
In last week's premiere episode, we met Stu and his boyfriend Andre. After Stu was killed and maybe/maybe not fed to the rest of bunker, Andre disappeared. I assumed he was killed off or something, an extraneous character that was simply removed. But he was back at the dinner table this week. That is the only place we see him. He doesn't spend time in the library; he isn't wandering the halls. He just shows up to dinner, then seems to retreat into his room. I don't really care about him as a character, but if he is NOT dead, give him some story or a reason to be there.
She has been hiding a disfiguring scoliosis hump on her back, her secret shame, and one that Langdon forces her to reveal in a very uncomfortable #metoo moment. I have to assume this disfigurement was behind her abstinence-only policy. It may also explain her vitriol toward men, one that goes way beyond the typical "men blew up the world because they were comparing penis sizes" argument. While I can't imagine it is something as simple as "a man was in bed with her, laughed at her hump, and that made her hate her hump AND men," that kind of feels like where it is going.
My guess is that Langdon has the witches from Coven guarding the place, and that is how they can prevent it from being overrun.
That surprise ending
Emily and Timothy are caught in a post-coital afterglow and are taken into the decontamination room to be killed. Timothy fights back, gets his hands on a gun, and shoots Mead before being knocked out by a guard who may be the tallest woman I have ever seen. Mead rushes from the room and checks her wounds, revealing that she is some sort of android. Instead of flesh and blood oozing from her wound, there is fluff and wires and a weird milky discharge. I'm not sure how I feel about this. It seems like there is a lot going on. The bunker is, ostensibly, haunted; there is witchcraft at work; the world is coming to an end; there is potential cannibalism; and now an android? It feels like someone went to the horror/sci-fi section of a 1980s video store, dumped all the VHS cassettes into a blender, and poured out the results into a TV show.