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The X-Files, “Ghost in the Machine”Oh, the 1990s. You’ve got to love ‘em. This X-Files episode focused on an evil AI that started killing people to protect itself. The only problem? The writers knew next to nothing about computers, so instead of being frightening, it’s absolutely ridiculous.

Bring me these eight artifacts if you want to go on a date with me

Contributed by
Aug 8, 2019, 1:00 PM EDT

Dating isn't easy in 2019. Sure, there are apps or other online options. And the old-fashioned idea of leaving your house. But despite all of the potential ways to meet "the one," it's even harder to know which ones are worth your time.

That's why I have a new solution.

Back in 1987, the badass Patricia Arquette gave Nicolas Cage a list of artifacts he had to collect for her before she would date/marry/go away with him. This seems like a totally logical and romantic idea that would work for a normal lady like myself. I mean, it worked for these Hollywood actors, what could go wrong? So, after swiping the right direction on Tinder or whatever, I now make all potential suitors round up all of the items I've ever needed in my life to be truly happy before I'm willing to go on a date with them.

In this day of unlimited options, I'd like to know that my potential true love is willing to go through whatever it takes (including possible jail time) to make sure they're dedicated before we venture out on a date together. Here's your quest, should you choose to accept.

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The views and opinions expressed in this article are the author's, and do not necessarily reflect those of SYFY WIRE, SYFY, or NBC Universal.