drag-me-to-hell
More info i
Credit: Universal

Chosen One of the Day: Alison Lohman's Drag Me to Hell office supplies

Contributed by
Oct 26, 2020, 10:55 AM EDT (Updated)

Like all horror aficianodos, I adore the Evil Dead movies. But my favorite Sam Raimi film, the Raimiest of Raimi movies, is Drag Me to Hell. It has everything. Cake. Cats. That sh*tbird Stu. And gallons upon gallons of bodily fluids. 

It also has the finest usage of office supplies this side of of a Staples. Hey, and speaking of Staples...

Credit: Universal

Christine Brown (Alison Lohman) has run afoul of Sylvia Ganush (Lorna Raver) when she refuses to grant her a third extension on her mortgage payment. Christine has shamed Mrs. Ganush and now must pay. But Christine has on this day chosen to bring home her tray of office supplies, meaning this parking garage fight (which shouldn't exist because it's a single-level bank branch with a large parking lot but that's neither here nor there, it's perfect) has myriad bonus weapons. Like a stapler.  But Sylvia Ganush isn't about to be taken down by a few staples.

Credit: Universal

Luckily, there's more where that came from. Can I get a ruling? Haha, that's ruler humor. I think. Honestly, sometimes I just say things. Anyway, excuse me, Mrs. Ganush, can we get your measurements?

Credit: Universal

But again, Sylvia Ganush is nothing to f*** with. Eff your ruler and your Ford Focus, you dirty pork queen.

Credit: Universal

Christine is, as ever, resourceful, leading to possibly my favorite moment in the film and some window face acting that Lohman deserved six Oscars and a Pulitzer for.

Credit: Universal

Today's Chosen One of the Day has been brought to you by the supplies closet at your workplace, saving lives one staple at a time. 

fangrrls_rightrail_burst
Top stories
fangrrls_rightrail_burst
Top stories

Make Your Inbox Important

Like Comic-Con. Except every week in your inbox.

Sign-up breaker