Chosen One of the Day: Professors Xavier's sinister eyebrows

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Nov 29, 2018, 11:57 AM EST (Updated)

Someone once said, “The eyes are the window to your soul.” If they had seen the eyebrows on Professor Charles Xavier in the original X-Men animated series, they might make an amendment to that deeply profound statement. The brows that sit just above Professor Xavier’s eyes could give Mr. Sinister a run for his money in a battle over who is more sinister.


These eyebrows scream, “Hey, you probably shouldn’t trust him.” For all we know, Morph's death in the second episode of the first season could have been an inside job. It costs money to keep those eyebrows maintained, and there is no way Professor Xavier doesn't have life insurance policies on each and every one of the X-Men and students. What better way to make sure you’re set for life than to open up a school for mutants and to send them off on missions from which they may very well never return? Exactly.

Professor X seems like a nice enough guy who just wants peace for all mutants, but those eyebrows are giving off a totally different vibe. How do we know those long nights spent with Cerebro aren’t being used to collect Social Security numbers from unsuspecting citizens? At one point in the series, the eyebrow game really goes off the rails. One of them is facing up while the other one is facing down. They are bone-chilling.


Only someone with those eyebrows would allow a teenager in a yellow jacket to go on dangerous missions. Sure, Magneto isn’t a saint, but at least his eyebrows don’t hold deep dark twisted secrets. Xavier’s do.

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