Chosen One of the Day: Simon and Hecubus

We have a lot of fun around here at Chosen One of the Day Headquarters. But sometimes we must eschew the fun, the happy, the thirsty, the Backstreet, and take a moment to honor...pure evil.

And none such evil is so pure as Sir Simon Milligan (Kevin McDonald) and his man-servant Hecubus (Dave Foley), the hosts of their own talk show taking place in the Pit of Ultimate Darkness. Simon is a man possessed by many demons ("polite demons that would open a door for a lady, carrying too many parcels BUT DEMONS NONETHELESS!").

Credit: CBC

Man-servant Hecubus is SUPER EVIL, spoiling movies and refusing to engage in card tricks. He's also tiny baby Dave Foley and therefore a literal fetus of a man in his 20s. But he remains, as ever, ready to serve Sir Simon. "Aaaaaaaaand Satan!"

The Kids in the Hall has been off the air for 25 years now (holy sh*t, I just made myself dizzy realizing that) but these evil, evil white boys will always be in the pits of ultimate darkness we call our hearts.