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Chosen One of the Day: That month we spent talking about Jeff Goldblum

Contributed by
Oct 31, 2018

Man, remember that? That was wild.

Today is Halloween. But it is also October 31, the final day of the month of October, and the day we bid a fond farewell to 31 Days of Jeff Goldblum. In case you hadn't noticed (you noticed, we saw the comments), we've dedicated the last 31 days to Jeffrey Lynn Goldblum — his films, his fashions, and so much more.

But today, we must look back. Cue the music.

Oh Jeff. Oh zaddy. Thank you for the memories, the halcyon October falling leaves of glory and beauty you gave us every single day. Literally every day. That's a lot of days. But you're a lot of Goldblum. And you gave us so much.

You served us lewk after lewk after lewk.

You served us puppy cuteness.

You served us glistening man chest.

You served us vaguely erotic (fine, nothing vague about it) sounds.

You served us fluids. It wasn't as sexy as we thought it would be. (Or was it?)

After spending an entire month with you, how are we ever supposed to go back to talking about anything else? What are we without you?

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No, please, don't look at us like that. We'll always have October 2018. This isn't goodbye, it's just... well, November, I guess. So, thank you. For being the absolute, complete and utter sex.

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You are, boo. You are.

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