Chosen One of the Day: The Huggabunch

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Jun 15, 2018, 11:14 AM EDT (Updated)

Most children of the '80s share a very specific kind of affliction: the constant question of "Was that a real movie or did I eat some bad Lunchables and dream it?"

And until the magic of Google years later, I believed The Huggabunch was very much the latter, that I'd dunked my Dunkaroos too hard and developed funfetti brain. But, no, it's real. Very, very real.

The Huggabunch was one of those very specifically '80s ventures wherein a toy would be turned into an entire film or television series, however flimsy the premise. One such toy was the Huggabunch, which were essentially if Cabbage Patch Dolls had murder eyes. The film dedicated to these nightmare dolls heavily featured the story of a grandma being sent off to a retirement home to die and a little girl tasked with saving her, thanks to the help of very ugly weird puppet dolls. Yes, that's the plot, that death will be visited upon our grandparents and, in time, us. But buy our dolls tho.

And really, I'm grateful. Because how else would my generation turn against the excess and corporate greed of the '80s than by being wholly ruined and emotionally destroyed by that excess and greed? The toys designed for us turned on us and made us terrified. THE TOYS WERE OUR CAPTORS AND NOW WE ARE FREE.

So thank you, Huggabunch, for scaring some of us into socialism I guess. 

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