Try and picture it: The year was 1999, and The Phantom Menace was a short time away from descending into theaters, 16 years after Star Wars went on an extended theatrical hiatus. It was the eve of the great new millennium and who better to bring us to this new wave of Star Wars content than parody-slash-polka-pop-papa of the twisted tales of music, Weird Al Yankovic?
Now, this wasn’t Weird Al’s first foray into Star Wars fanon — he released a play on “Lola” by the Kinks, called “Yoda” and it’s great. Now, please indulge me as I force-ghost into conspiracy theory land but Weird Al might be a Jedi considering he could see right into the future with his 1985 lyrics:
Well, I heard my friends really got in a mess
So I'm gonna have to leave Yoda, I guess
But I know that I'll be coming back some day
I'll be playing this part 'till I'm old and gray
The long-term contract that I had to sign
Says I'll be making these movies till the end of time
With my Yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda yo-yo-yo-yo Yoda
But back to 1999. “The Saga Begins” — a parody of Don Mclean’s “American Pie” told from the perspective of Obi Wan Kenobi (please someone get this phrase tattooed on your body) — came out a full month before the release of the first prequel. Yankovic wrote the lyrics using spoilers he found on the internet (yes children, this is what the internet has always been like).
I don’t really know how to pick my favorite part of the song or the video, they’re both so wonderfully perfect and absurd and accurate, but if there was a blaster pointed at my heart by Poe Dameron who I assume would not miss, I guess I’d go with the part where Al sings:
Oh my my, this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later, now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
Did you know this junkyard slave
Isn't even old enough to shave
But he can use the Force they say
Ahh, do you see him hitting on the queen
Though he's just 9 and she's 14
Yeah, he's probably gonna marry her someday
He is going to marry her and it’ll be a love story for the ages and I am being serious and not facetious. Anakin/Padme tragi-love-story forever.
Anyway, here’s to you Jedi Master Weird Al Yankovic. Thank you for being you, please give us a new song about: