Chosen One of the Day: Hexxus from Ferngully: The Last Rainforest

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May 9, 2017, 6:55 PM EDT (Updated)

Back in the '90s, the world went animation crazy. It was the start of the Disney renaissance and dozens of other production houses were pumping out their own movies too, which led to countless tiny animated movies that only those of us devouring children's media by the truckful at the time remember with any fondness.

One of the most ridiculous additions to this list was Ferngully: The Last Rainforest (1992), the story of a human who is shrunken down to the size of a fairy and learns the virtue of caring about the planet and not killing the rainforest.

The movie starred Samantha Mathis as Crysta, a naive and rebellious young fairy, Christian Slater as a kind of fairy-meathead and Robin Williams as a bat who had escaped from human experimentation (and who raps) ... but hands-down the best part of this insane movie was Hexxus, the sentient cloud of pollution voiced by Tim Curry.

Hexxus is the main villain of the movie. He escapes from his twisted tree prison because humans are stupid and need to make cheap furniture and build houses and shop at IKEA. His first order of business? Consume a whole bunch of pollution to become a giant, humanoid plume of toxic waste. His second: direct the giant tree-killing machine to Ferngully to take some long-awaited revenge on the fairies. You know, like you do.

Oh, he also sings what is easily the greatest villain song of all time. Sorry, every Disney movie ever.

I don't know what it is about Tim Curry's voice, but some aspect of it makes even a cloud of literal poison sound like liquid sex. Hell, even the weird oil/sludge-based worm version of the character was kinda hot.

Maybe it's the way he hangs on those Ss. Maybe it's that haughty undertone infused into every line. Maybe it's the fact that he somehow got away with making borderline sex noises in a song for children.

Whatever it was, and whatever god or higher power managed to get him signed on to this movie, I thank them eternally.

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