This Kraft commercial reunites Vanilla Ice with the Ninja Turtles, makes everyone feel old

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Feb 19, 2014, 11:58 AM EST

Go, ninja. Go, ninja. Go. Wait, I didn't mean it. Come back!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Secret of the Ooze is about to celebrate its 23rd birthday. Does that make anyone hyper-aware of their own mortality? Asking for a friend. That friend, by the way? Is NOT Vanilla Ice. That dude has not aged a day.

And I don't know that because I'm stalking Robert Van Winkle. Thanks, restraining order! No, it's a matter of public record now thanks to a new commercial from, of all things, Kraft Mac & Cheese. Yes, really. In the ad, Ice plays a stockboy and then ... well, see for yourself.

A few things to keep in mind:

  • Vanilla Ice is being named Outstanding Citizen of the Year this month in Wellington, Fla.
  • He is also about to go on tour with Coolio, where he will perform "Ninja Rap" repeatedly.
  • The mother in this video is significantly younger than I am.
  • Oh, God. Oh, God. This is the worst timeline, isn't it?

(via Uproxx)