Real-life Luke Sky Walker arrested, Mark Hamill chimes in on the 'real crime'

Contributed by
Dec 3, 2018

The accused are innocent until proven guilty, so our Earthbound court system will have to decide if a certain Johnson City, Tennessee, man with an instantly recognizable Star Wars name was channeling the dark side of the Force when police arrested him recently for alleged theft. 

But Mark Hamill didn’t need a copy of the police report to zero in on one especially glaring offense related to the case, once stories about the arrest hit the internet: why would anyone who’s not from a galaxy far, far away ever stick their offspring with a name like Luke Sky Walker?

As you can see, the Force evidently was on the side of the police in Elizabethton, Tennessee, where Mr. Walker reportedly was arrested last week on alleged violation of probation stemming from an earlier felony theft charge. But leave it to Hamill to weigh in on the additional burden of what it must feel like to be handcuffed, for life, by one of the heaviest of family names.

Spying the reported 21-year-old’s mug shot once the story went viral, Hamill also zeroed in on another potential, ahem, shortcoming for the 5’6’’ suspect, and tagged the story with the incredibly case-specific #AlsoTooShortForAStormtrooper.

At least Hamill stayed away from presuming guilt or innocence, and refrained from weighing Mr. Walker’s alleged theft charge in the court of public opinion. And why would he? Video evidence strongly suggests that Movie Luke himself’s not above flippantly hopping some unsuspecting Imperial’s speeder bike — just to take a destructive and short-lived joyride. 

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