Alien Day has reared its vicious head. If there's anything from our own world to put one of the terrifying facehuggers from the Alien franchise on, it's a mask — because you need to put the creature in its natural habitat. So why not a snorkel mask?
ThinkGeek might have come up with one of the most bizarre pieces of Alien merch that you absolutely have to have, whether or not you actually go snorkeling or are planning future underwater adventures. The facehugger snorkel mask exists because underwater, no one can hear you scream.
If you do take the plunge, this exclusive creation that clearly spawned on another planet would look right at home among the horseshoe crabs and other sea arthropods.
You don't need to take off to a tropical locale just to have fun scaring people with this thing. Anywhere there's water, you can creep up on someone, which means backyard pools just got a whole lot more dangerous. No one can stop you from doing the same thing on dry land, either, because it looks so dead-on (except for the eye panel) that your victim might actually think something extraterrestrial is plastered to your face.
For actual snorkelers who are going to use this for its intended purpose, it's just as functional for venturing into the uncharted shallows as it is for Xenomorph-infested exoplanets. You breathe through the creature's tail and the flexible snorkel clip reduces jaw fatigue. An adaptable skirt creates a fail-proof watertight seal to keep any annoying fluids — H2O or otherwise — from getting in, and the polycarbonate lens has an anti-fog coating for clear viewing even if something strange is breathing over your shoulder.
This thing also fits most adult human heads, though the same can't be said for other species.
You know you want such a wildly inappropriate snorkeling mask, so abduct one from ThinkGeek. It's guaranteed not to require surgical removal or leave behind a chestburster in its wake.