Candy canes and silver lanes aglow are the last things you should expect in Innsmouth around this time of year. Think decrepit buildings, strange-looking locals, and a pervasive fishy smell that only gets worse at low tide.
Fishmen, which is YouTuber Haakor’s take on H.P. Lovecraft’s nightmare fuel The Shadow Over Innsmouth, reimagines the possibly blasphemous horror story as a just-off-Broadway musical number for which the cast was clearly chosen because of their Innsmouth look. The ad they put in for extras must have been asking for genetic mutations like bulging eyes, flat noses, and a grayish complexion. Visible gills were probably a plus.
The preternaturally cheerful narrator of this music video (who grows less and less cheerful as the hideous truth about Innsmouth and his lineage unravels, as it does in the story) probably describes the Deep Ones best:
They speak with guttural croaks and to hear them provokes a profound desire to flee;
Their eyes never blink and quite frankly they stink like a carcass washed up on the sea.
For a production made without all the gold of Cthluhu, the special effects are believably creepy in a way that you keep trying to convince yourself is really makeup or CGI, even though you know in the back of your mind that it can’t—or shouldn’t—be anything else. Otherwise, you would find yourself lying on a mattress in the Gilman House Hotel in a helpless descent into madness.
This video has been on my radar for a while, because whenever I have a horrible day, watching it on repeat is the only thing I need to remind me that that there are much worse things than falling down the stairs or wrestling with my health insurance company on my phone for an hour. Things like being told certain legends in the raspy and sometimes raving voice of the town drunk, who is mysteriously washed away by a wave that brings fish-frog mutants that cannot be unseen. Things like finding out your geneaology is not what you think it is when you finally feel brave enough to look in the mirror.
I dare anyone who hears It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas blasting on the mall speakers to sing this out loud instead.