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The 30 thirstiest moments of Avengers: Infinity War

Contributed by
Aug 2, 2018

With the digital release of Avengers: Infinity War, we are finally able to revisit the most ambitious crossover of all time in the privacy of our own homes. That crossover? Our love of superheroes and our lust of superheroes. And this movie brought both in abundance. To celebrate, we giffed the 30 most thirst-inducing moments of the film.

Grab a couple bottles of water while you read. It's gonna get thirsty in here.

First and foremost, the god of thunder brought the pants thunder.

swing

I mean, LOOK AT THOSE ARMS.

thor-angles

Drax was all of us.

drax-thor

I mean, he gets it. He gets it that Thor can get it.

drax-thor2

And CAN YOU BLAME HIM? Holy arms, Batman. 

holy-arms

Gamora certainly understands, to Peter's chagrin.

gathora

Not that they didn't get to enjoy their own thirsty moments (in which Drax was also all of us).

peter-gamora-creeper

But in terms of proper canonical couples, Wanda and Vis were the ones bringing the heat.

scarlet-vis

Vis had us all a little red, tbh.

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Meanwhile Natasha and Bruce only had one real moment, but it was hot enough to cut an infinity stone out of a weird gold glove.

hibruce

nat

Sam knows. Sam is uncomfortable.

thisisawkward

Then there was that moment of hot Sherlock on Sherlock action. Look at this. You can actually hear Tumblr's heaving breaths.

sherlock-on-sherlock

Speaking of Tony, the one time I *got* the Thanos lust was when Thanos gave Tony a good beating and then served him some dramatic tea. 

thanos-tony

But an entire movie's worth of evil villainry is nothing compared to this one withering side-eye from Okoye, a look that launched a thousand thirsts. Look at me that way, please, it's all I've ever needed.

side-eye

And her team-up with Black Widow and Scarlet Witch to take on Proxima Midnight? I believe "guh" is the word you're looking for.

not-alone

GUH I SAID.

why-was-she-up-there

On the subject of badass ladies, Maria Hill got literally nothing to do in this movie but she invokes thirst by EXISTING so I must include her. Such is the power of Cobie "Her Name Doesn't Sound Like 'Smolders' For Nothin'" Smulders.

maria

Bucky with the good hair using Rocket as a gun while spinning John Woo-style filled a very specific need for me and I am very grateful.

rocket-arm

But let's pour some out for the film's greatest missed thirst opportunity. WHAT KIND OF BACK-PATTY BRO HUG IS THIS? Did you not want to embarass each other in front of T'Challa? Because he looks disappointed too. Everyone does. T'CHALLA WOULD BE COOL WITH YOUR BEAUTIFUL LOVE, BOYS.

lost-opportunity-thirst

And now this post becomes the Steve Rogers sexbeard appreciation zone you knew that it would be, starting with T'Challa hotly demanding hot Steve gets his hot shield. It's all hot and good.

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To which Steve nodded, hotly.

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I mean, that intro shot? Be still our beating everything.

cap-bae

I mean do you think he's sorry that you're thirsting so hard?

cap-permission

A truly thirst-inducing hero knows that war is no excuse for impoliteness.

introductions

And there's always time for a pleasant chat with an old friend.

haircut-beard

But mostly it's a lot of sexy punching.

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Much sexy. Very punching.

steve-punch-thanos

He's working so hard and that is for US. You're thirsty and you're welcome.

steve-working-so-hard

Sigh.

steve-sunset-bae