Greetings, weary traveler, and well met. No, you aren't clicking through the text dump of some NPC at a generic RPG inn, you've just made it to the end of yet another week. And I, a real person (I swear), am proud of you. Let's face it: survival is not guaranteed, yet I believe you muddled through with your sanity somehow more or less intact. Good for you!
Part of your remaining sanity probably stems from not having stared at the never-ending feed of nerdy news every day. But you still need to know, don't you? Still have that yearning for knowledge? Well, you're in luck, because here they are — the 5 biggest stories from... The Week in Geek!
WHY WAS SOLO'S BOX OFFICE SO LOW?
The big question on everyone's lips this week was, "What happened, Han?" There had been this estimation from Disney that Solo: A Star Wars Story would make somewhere in the neighborhood of $150 million domestic in its opening weekend. Instead it landed at $103 million.
And now, here we are, a nerd community collectively backseat-driving the situation. Why did Kathleen Kennedy replace Lord and Miller? Why did they go so far over budget? Was a Han Solo movie without Harrison Ford a bad idea? Is Solo's soft opening revenge because Rian Johnson didn't write Luke Skywalker in The Last Jedi the way some fans (included Mark Hamill) wanted? Is this all a part of a cultural backlash against SJW virtue signaling in media?
It's... a lot. And whether you think Solo was good or bad is kind of irrelevant, because the only conversation we don't seem to be having is whether or not we liked it. Which is weird, because none of us are corporate executives, so our opinions on franchise synergy or whatever don't matter much.
But it'll be interesting to see how Solo performs in the weeks to come and how Disney will react to Solo's weak debut.
SPIDER-MAN TURNS 800
No, not 800 years old. Only timelords and Qs in a continuum and other spacey god types live that long. However, Dan Slott, who has been writing for Spider-Man now for a DECADE, just released his penultimate issue of the Spidey saga, The Amazing Spider-Man #800. And it was a doozy full of Red Goblins and Venoms and Anti-Venoms. Old suits, new suits, redemptions and deaths.
And now there's only one Dan Slott issue left before Spider-Man's journey begins under a new team with a new direction. And that's that thing where sadness and excitement meet.
JAMES MARSDEN IS MAYBE SONIC THE HEDGEHOG?
So here's a weird thing you might not know about: Sonic the Hedgehog has a very intense fanbase, whether his games are good or not. And there's been a desire to make a live-action/CGI hybrid movie for about four years now. There hasn't been a ton of movement on it, but the fan love has softly stoked the fires.
Fun fact: Marsden already has a background in playing both animated characters like the prince in Enchanted AND playing off of CGI characters like he did with the Easter Bunny in a movie called Hop.
Who wrote Hop? Why, it was Brian Lynch, the writer behind Minions and The Secret Life of Pets! And those movies? Made by Illumination Entertainment! What is Illumination working on? A Super Mario Bros. movie!
All of which is to say the world of animation is incestuous and funny and weird and I think too much about it, I guess.
JAMIE FOXX IS ACTUALLY SPAWN
Todd McFarlane really wants another crack at a Spawn movie and has wanted one for years. The Michael Jai White adaptation wasn't beloved at release over 20 years ago and it hasn't exactly aged well, either.
No, what McFarlane wants is to take the success of the Keith David animated version and to bring something more akin to that to the big, live-action screen — and he wants to write and direct it himself. Which, if you ask me, uh... yikes. Seems like a lot.
But what do I know, because award-winning and comic book-loving actor, Jamie Foxx, is on board to be Spawn. How much of Foxx we'd actually see is debatable, but he's committed, and so is McFarlane since his plan is to make a trilogy of Spawn films.
Will it work? Will McFarlane and Foxx come together to bring the dream of a non-origin Spawn story to the big screen in a way that's financially successful enough to generate sequels and maybe a Savage Dragon movie, too, because why not at that point? Only time will tell.
FALLOUT 76 ANNOUNCED
You'd think that, with the constant threat of world-ending scenarios, conspiracy theories galore, and intense conflict among every community you can think of, maybe people would be done with the post-apocalypse. You would be wrong.
Fallout 76, the latest in a string of end-of-the-world sandbox games from Bethesda, was just announced and people are thrilled! I guess we're just gonna go on ahead and race to the finish line of human civilization then? Okay!
What we know is that the game is set, at least partly, in the year 2102, placing it far earlier than any previous Fallout story. There are also rumors that 76 will be an online survival game but, if that's the case, Bethesda is keeping mum on the subject and we won't know more until E3.
And that's it! Your ner week in a nutshell was basically a bunch of S-words (Sonic, Spider-Man, Solo, Spawn) and then Fallout which is about surviving (also with an 's') after the end of the world. So that's very uplifting.
Have a safe weekend everybody!