The War on Easter: Season 2, Episode 1

WARNING: If you don't want to know what happened in this episode, don't read this photo recap! 

Happy is back, and more absurd than ever! We waste no time getting right into the good stuff: a clutch of ambivalent nuns is ready to commit ritual suicide by TNT, but one level-headed among them has misgivings about the whole thing, and bolts. Good for her.

After being pursued by her mother superior a few city blocks (you don't see that every day, even in NYC), the errant nun rummages through the trash and finds a detonator to the dynamite-vests all her sisters have strapped to them, in an easter egg, and one by one sets them off. They blow up like carnage confetti bombs.

In lay news, Nick is trying to go sober. And it's sort of working, thanks to Happy's incessant, insistent, cute and cuddly reminders.

At three o'clock, he rushes over to pick up Hailey from school like the good father he's trying so hard to become. He's met with unpleasant news: Hailey has been misbehaving at and vandalizing the school, as well as psychologically torturing her teachers and classmates (extra credit is due to this one). Of course, her behavior is understandable considering the recent trauma she experienced, but her teacher thinks she needs some more focused care... at a Catholic girl's school.

Speaking of Catholics... Sonny Shines has dropped in at the Vatican (looking like he just dropped acid at the Vatican) and is trying to sell the Pope on his new scheme to re-brand Easter. Soft-boiled eggs? The Pope Daddy accepts.

And Blue, possessed in prison (spinoff?), is getting harrassed by every cellmate and his bunk mate, including the cockroach wedgie.

Nick has to tell Amanda that he got Hailey kicked out of school. Amanda's dealing with some Sunny-related PTSD, so now's not the best time for it. But she's surprisingly understanding of the situation. From time to time, it's nice to see someone so well-adjusted.

That rogue nun? She got picked up pretty fast by the po-po, and she sings like a choir boy. She and her sisters were told that the ritual suicide would bring about their assumption to heaven, and that the detonator would kill the person closest to it, which is why she volunteered herself. Only this was a lie. Who told her all this...?

This... thing. Leather. Big Teeth. Pink eye. The nun says that pink eye is like a bunny's, but we know where it really probably came from... conjunctivitis?

Moving on.... This is Scooter Sterling, president of a children's foundation talking to his colleague about a recent news hit job that claimed his foundation was embezzling donations meant to go to... children. He's upset.

But when he follows a young woman making eyes at him into a dark hallway hoping to score, he instead gets taken down by a figure in black with a napkin soaked in chloroform, Scooter isn't upset any longer. He's knocked out. Just nod if you can hear us, Scooter.

And some more updates: Merry has become a realtor! So many r's! And she's really good at it, except for the fact that Nick has been following her around and crashing her showing parties. Why? Because Nick wants to borrow a place for when he has custody of Hailey. That kind of makes his bizarre behavior seem sort of... redeeming. After the initial awkwardness is over, Merry and Nick chat in the kitchen about life, love, and what Merry's wearing (not her usual MO). They skirt over the Sunny Shines issue, and commisserate over hard times.

A little bored with the convo, Happy heads into the bathroom, and discovers puberty. Apparently, puberty is a thing that plagues imaginary friends, too, and not just teens and late bloomers.

Isabella comes to visit Blue in prison, and she's brought backup: a nun (this one wasn't blown sky high). She tells Blue that Mikey transfered over an ancient demon of death, Orcus, and that it's living inside him now. And she's right. The problem, as the sister informs us, is that something went wrong upon transference, and Orcus is now trapped in Blue's body and can't jump into another Scaramucci's.

Why? Because the nun uses her quilting needles to kill off the only remaining Scaramucci – Isabella. Bad nun.

And Nick, who's driving a cab now, picks up this scuzzball. His date ran off on him (can't imagine why) and he's prepared to pay $1000 for a new one. Nick thinks he can hook it up.

Nick picks up one of his sex worker friends, and brings her here... a warehouse. The clients want her to get dressed in a hospital gown. And she's asked about her blood type. Business. As. Usual.

Except it's not. They had gathered to harvest the prostitute's blood and organs and pump them into some old guy. When Happy found out, he tells Nick, who despite his better intentions, goes about killing everyone. Then he collects the spilled guts, and seeks to cash in.

And Merry, far from having "given up" the case, has built herself a little forensics nest at home, and is hard at work trying to unravel the whole Sunny Shines cabal.

Oh, and who is the man in black leather with the bunnie ears? It's Smoothie! The eunuch! And who's that behind him? It's Sonny Shine! The jerk.