Superbowl Sunday is just around the corner and everyone's buzzing about their plans. But no matter what you do, the wrestlers of WWE Smackdown are here to tell you can expect for the 48th year running.
You're wake up on Sunday with a thrilling sense of purpose. No need to put of the gym when you're already diving head first into your first beer from the moment the cockerel crows.
So you'll get decked out like a mascot and feel connected to the sport even if you're only in it for the nachos.
Then you'll remember that you know absolutely nothing about the sport, so you'll glance around for someone to give you the play by play.
And will inevitably miss the first big moment of the game, bringing your reluctant instructor down with you.
And now that you've expended so much energy cramming knowledge into your brain that you'll have forgotten by the time the next one rolls around, you're too exhausted to pay attention to the only part of the game you care about: the halftime show.
Which means it's probably time to head back over to the snack table and refuel.
This is when the food coma sets in...like a kick to the face that travels like a stone before kerplunking in your gut and swelling and throbbing in a pool of deep-fried stomahc acid.
Which means you're ready to jump back into the fray and watch the game...or at least nap in front of the television.
And before you know it, the superbowl is over! Congradulations You made it through another year of pig skin and potato skins!