Halloween is barely over, Thanksgiving is nearly a month away, and yet the the machine of consumerism insists that Christmas infiltrate a retail store near you.
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We could try to speak about this calmly...
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But let's be honest
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This early occupation is not meant to spread holiday cheer.
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It's designed to part you from your hard earned cash!
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So let's stand up an re-claim seasonality
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And shout: Now is the time of the pumpkin spice! Peppermint can wait!
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You got that? Eggnog too!
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Put that in your turkey and stuff it!
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But dont forget to give thanks that an encroaching Christmas season is the least of your worries.