The Best of 2015: Witchy Spells for Syfy Characters

You know Ruth and Paige, the witchy duo that sent the world of Bitten spinning with magic and mystery. Here are some characters from other Syfy shows that could use a spell from our favorite witches to improve their quality of life … or just, you know, for laughs.

1. Jennifer Goines (12 Monkeys)
   Recommended Spell: Sanity
   
   True, if the enfant terrible of 12 Monkeys weren't bonkers crazy, there really wouldn't be a, well, plot to 12 Monkeys. But dear lord, could this lady use a break from her own brain.
   
   
   

   When Cole wakes up in the mental institution, he finds Jennifer looking like a terrifying demon from across the room.

   
    
2. Callandra 'Cally' Henderson Tyrol (Battlestar Galactica)
   Recommended Spell: Anti-Annoying
   
   All we're saying is if Cally had maybe been a little less shrewish and impulsive she might not have engaged in a series of ever-escalating unfortunate events that eventually led to her being shot out of a launch tube by Tory Foster. Maybe. (Hey, at least she wasn't a damn Cylon … right?)
   
   
   
   
    
3. Doc Yewll (Defiance)
   Recommended Spell: Perfect Bedside Manner
   
   Oh, don't get us wrong - we love Doc exactly the way she is. We just think it would be a treat to see how the citizens of Defiance would react if their gruff town physician was suddenly … you know, nice. Wasn't there an episode of The Dukes of Hazzard that went something like this?
   
   
   
   
    
4. Michael & Gabriel (Dominion)
   Recommended Spell: Switch Bodies
   
   Michael is an archangel who sides with mankind and commands the Archangel Corps, the first line of defense in the fortified city of Vega. His brother, the archangel Gabriel, believes humans to be the reason for God's disappearance and is determined to wipe them from the face of the Earth. These two couldn't be more different … so how hilarious would it be if they suddenly switched bodies, a la the Judge Reinhold/Fred Savage comedy classic, Vice Versa? Oh, the humanity!
   
   
   
   
    
5. Duke Crocker (Haven)
   Recommended Spell: Peace of Mind
   
   We love Duke, but his self-absorbed nature and constant brooding can be exhausting. Just to give him (and us) a break from himself for a little while, we'd like to see his pervasive emo-ness and knack for melodrama trumped by being, well, content-ish. For at least, you know, half an episode.
   
   
   

   Duke gets annoyed with a customer at The Grey Gull and accidentally infects her with a Trouble. At least it helps him decide to get some help.
   
    
6. Peter Farragut (Helix)
   Recommended Spell: Eternal Sleep
   
   When we last saw Peter at the end of the second season of Helix, he was being led away in chains by the authorities for killing a bunch of people in gruesome ways on the island of St. Germain. At this point, Peter just needs to have a nice long nap … like, forever.
   
   
   

   … but when Kyle's boss shows up to ask if there's enough to arrest "Dr. Farragut," guess who ends up in cuffs? Anne's a mess, but we're pretty sure everyone else is content with this outcome for Peter. Enjoy your orange jumpsuit, twerp.

   
    
7. Bo (Lost Girl)
   Recommended Spell: Abstinence
   
   What a twist that would be, eh? We're just curious to see what Bo would do to heal, feed and kill sans her go-to modus operandi: sex. It would be interesting (for a little while, anyway) to see what types of tactics a “Waiting for Marriage” Fae would come up with … if any.
   
   
   

   Before long revenants come crawling forth from the underworld and Bo’s succubus instincts kick in immediately.
   
    
8. Hero (Olympus)
   Recommended Spell: I Know Kung Fu
   
   For someone named “Hero,” this guy sure gets his ass kicked an awful lot. Sure, he's crafty, but he also has a tendency to get caught by the Athenian soldiers, and, well, maybe some sudden martial arts skills might help him live up to his namesake a little better.
   
   
   

   Hero's response to Oracle's explanation of his heritage -- and the priest's attempt to get him to share his Olympus-unlocking power with the Gaians -- is to look like someone passed gas right under his nostrils. He makes the same face when the priest blackmails him with Theo's life, then slits Theo's throat anyway. Maybe someone has a nervous stomach?

All month we're counting down the Best of 2015. Here's the full list thus far if you care!