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91 thoughts we had while watching Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey
In 1991, our worlds were forever changed. Oh, what? No, that was just me? Just me who was taken in by the perfection of the sequel to an already perfect movie? OK, fine. In 1991, my world was forever changed. Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey released into theaters. It was an absurd follow-up to the himbo duo's (himbuo's?) Excellent Adventure, and it was Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter at their most bodacious. The two battle Death himself, they go up against their evil mirrored foes, and they live the lives they want to live! It's practically Homerian. I rewatched the movie for SYFY WIRE Fangrrls, and let's just say I had a few thoughts. Maybe more than a few.
- I love the fact that in the '80s they dreamed that California (and presumably America?) would still exist in 2691 A.D. I'd like to make a call from 2019 and say: Ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha! Sob.
- Also el-em-ay-oh at Bill & Ted being the Chosen Ones of Prophecy.
- KILLER logo, y'all.
- Shout-out to the foam-core / Zenon-Girl-of-the-21st-Century-original-Disney-Channel-movie costume of the 2600s, bro.
- "Be excellent to each other." I would vote for whoever runs on this platform.
- Bless George Carlin for doing these movies.
- I'm bringing "non-bogus" back as an adjective.
- WHY ARE THEY ALWAYS TOTALLY BOGUS JERKS WHO WANNA RUIN A GOOD TIME?
- Is the bad guy in this movie played by Werner Herzog? (Jkjkjkjkjk.)
- There is nothing I love more in the world than the juxtaposition of George Carlin in his foamcore-Luke-on-Tatooine-look and De Nomolos who looks like he fanboys Vader.
- "I am anti-establishment." - De Nomolos, probably.
- OK, I laughed so hard at the evil!Bill & evil!Ted introduction that I had to pause the movie.
- Bill & Ted flew so that Dude, Where's My Car? could exist, I guess.
- WHY IS THAT GRAPPLING HOOK SHAPED LIKE A RAD '80S GUITAR? (Rhetorical because you know what, it looks rad as hell so who cares?)
- "I am Bill S. Preston, ESQUIRE." I don't care what definition Bill uses, I'm down with him being either or BOTH.
- "They're from Medieval England."
"Ted, shut up."
"Uh, Medieval England, Iowa."
- OK, I can't quote everything because this would be so long, but just rest assured that every line of dialogue in this movie is pure gold.
- Hey! Pam Grier!!
- Oh my God the princess' accent, I love it, it's so terrible. It's so perfect.
- Watching bb Keanu is like looking at the sun, he is so handsome.
- One perfect shot.jpg
- SOFT BOYS KISSING THEIR FIANCES ON THE CHEEK *crying emoji*
- Smart of them to have evil!Bill & evil!Ted miss killing the cat because then they'd be irredeemable, tbh.
- "Not bad."
"Yeah … let's make it bad!" lmao
- We love a good use of Keanu's bangs
- God, I love that Jim Martin from Faith No More is actually in this movie.
- "I wonder if after we're married, the princesses will stay over with us?"
"Yeah, our girlfriends are most chaste."
I know I said I wasn't going to quote the whole movie, but come on.
- ALSO ONE PERFECT SHOT.JPG
- Bill & Ted are sad and watching Star Trek and I can identify with them very heavily. I, too, find comfort in the idea of a socialist future when I am sad.
- What's better than one bb Keanu? TURNS OUT IT'S TWO BB KEANUS even if one is evil.
- Bill! Listen to your friend's instincts! Ted knows of which he speaks!
- How come this movie isn't called Bill & Ted's Most Unprecedented Expedition?
- Could have done without ever hearing the phrase "robot-chubbie" if I'm being honest, though.
- I think this might be my favorite time-travel/death movie.
- All four of the Bill & Teds air-guitaring over how righteous IRL robots are absolutely tracks.
- Ugh, love watching an older movie and then getting hit in the face with a random slur against a marginalized group. (Re-release this movie and dub that line over 2k19!)
- "We're fully, full-on, evil robots." Yep.
- OK, NOW THE MOVIE REALLY GETS GOIN' WITH THE DEATH OF OUR TWO GOOD HEROES. Most excellent.
- I un-ironically love this shot and the use of color.
- Best Death or Best Death?
- They just gave Death a wedgie and I don't understand how this movie didn't win an Oscar. Follow-up: someone give me a t-shirt that says "Give Death a Wedgie."
- The foreshadowing of using "Station!" as slang for "Awesome" is A+.
- Hal Landon Jr. acting as Captain Logan possessed by Ted is so good I also think it deserves an Oscar.
- Hi, welcome to: "Preeti tries to get Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey a retrospective Oscar."
- Big laughs at them using classical guitar and not electric guitar when he does the air guitar.
- Get me this book.
- Missy accidentally banishing Bill & Ted to hell is just outstanding work all around.
- Oh, I didn't know Tim Curry was in this.
- And this is when Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey turns into a Tom Petty music video.
- "You're not strong, you're silky boys." Silky boys >>> strong boys. Let's be real.
- That evil Colonel (or whatever) calls them warm, tasty little buttercakes and honestly, agree.
- No! Bill! Ted! You never split up!
- Oh my goodness, wee actual bebe Bill & Ted I cannot.
- This whole sequence has such serious Tim Burton vibes.
- Fun Fact: Granny S. Preston, Esquire, is also played by Alex Winters.
- Maybe this movie is a horror movie, good lord.
- The reveal of Bill & Ted playing Battleship against Death is *chef's kiss*.
- Battleship sucks.
- "Sorry, Death, you lose. It was Professor Plum." Also belongs on a t-shirt.
- The absurdity of forcing Death to play a series of infuriating games from the '80s and '90s is the definition of "Most Excellent."
- Why is heaven pastel-purple?
- What happened to you, boxer man???
- "What is the meaning of life?" I cannot WAIT to see how they answer.
"Every rose has its thorn, just like every night has its dawn. Just like every cowboy sings a sad, sad song." That tracks.
- Where are those fake Bill & Ted heads? I hope they're sitting in a museum somewhere.
- Keanu-Bangs-o-vision! Wait, no.
- So that's where Tony Stark got his aesthetic.
- Quick question: What the f***?
- Bill & Ted Conquer Death would also be a good name for this movie.
- "Dinner's over, worm-dude" is the new "They have made worm's meat of me!" you heard it here first, folks.
- Evil!Bill's commitment to "I got a idea" is great character work.
- Omg yes, it's time for small Stations to become ONE GIANT STATION.
- Love a montage!
- Oh man these '90s/Steampunk Good!Robot versions of Bill & Ted, I need them.
- LOL, Pam Grier just like, "Sure, you can kill those girls at the finale."
- Can we bring the air-guitar back?
- I stan a movie that includes a random brick wall backstage at a battle of the bands for no reason whatsoever except that the Good!Robots need to burst through it.
- I love that evil!Bill & evil!Ted just … give up on seeing the Good!Robots. There's no fight. They just accept that they've lost. It's like that part of Toy Story 3 where the toys accept their own mortality.
- Uh oh, Werner Herzog-who is not Werner Herzog is back.
- Ted: Dude, how're we gonna get out of this?! We don't got any time!
Bill: Yeah we do, dude. Look after we get away from this guy, we use the booth, we time travel back to before the concert and set up the things we need to get him now.
Ted: Woooah. Yeah, like what?
Bill: Like a ... like a sandbag.
*sandbag immediately falls from the rafters and hits the gun out of Werner Herzog-who is not Werner Herzog's hands*
- I LOVE IT BECAUSE THEY JUST SAY WHAT THEY'RE GOING TO DO AND IT'S ALREADY DONE IMMEDIATELY, AND THIS MOVIE IS SO GENIUS.
- Buddy, Avengers really missed out on using this tool for their Time-Heist.
- I love this f***ing movie.
- Yeah, Death! Use what you've learned of wedgie-ing for good!
- We knew that Pam Grier wasn't just there to be a random cameo.
- "That was Mr. Chuck De Nopolos. My old gym teacher." I-am-Dead.gif
- Bill & Ted straight up Captain America'd, leaving and immediately returning after living a life they wanted to live.
- How do I get to see Bill & Ted and Dragonforce in concert?
- I'd like to thank the costume designer for these pants.
- There's a whole g*dd*mn story in the credits using newspaper headlines. They're together and the world is great, then there's a rumored split and the Dow dropped but don't worry! It was a hoax! Bill & Ted are forever together musicians!
- This movie is Most Excellent and Not At All Bogus. The end.