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Chosen One of the Day: The mutant crabs of Island Claws
Creature features are usually meant to scare us but 1980’s Island Claws invokes hunger more than anything else. The movie takes place in Florida where a biological experiment goes awry, making small succulent crabs turn into 8-foot killer succulent crabs. This movie is an hour-and-a-half commercial for your favorite seafood place. I hope you have your bib ready for this one.
Island Claws is filled to the boiling pot rim with crabs. About a minute of the opening credits is dedicated to a montage of crabs set to groovy elevator music. The normal-sized crabs get a lot of shine before we see any giant crabs. They are actually the first to get a kill by causing a man to have a nuclear-level breakdown after they overrun the school bus he lives in. His freakout leads to him accidentally setting his home on fire, killing himself and all the crabs in his bus. This scene is intended to be horrifying but instead, it just leaves you wondering how those barbecued crabs tasted. Also, they're crabs, not spiders.
The super crab finally shows up on the screen in the last 10 minutes of the movie. Two main characters work together to kill it before it can destroy the restaurant bar located just off the shore. It’s a good thing they do because where else would they cook all that deliciously mutated crab meat? Hopefully, they had a year-supply of garlic butter available because it's gonna be the biggest seafood boil ever.