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Credit: Marvel Studios

Chosen One of the Day: America's Ass

Contributed by
May 2, 2019

Spoilers for Avengers: Endgame throughout. 

In Avengers: Endgame the gang follows in the footsteps of the greats: Marty McFly, the Doctor, Bill S. Preston, Esquire and Ted Theodore Logan, III. They’re going back in time for a time heist!

Part of the fun in the time travel conceit is getting to watch our favorite characters interact with their former selves, whether it’s Hermione staring at the back of her head and asking “Is that really what my hair looks like from the back?” or Bill and Ted jamming with Bill and Ted.

So, when the Avengers head back to NYC in 2012 during the battle of New York, 2023 Tony kicks off what might be my new favorite time-travel call back sequence of all time. He’s hiding behind the wall in his Avengers tower apartment, watching the original group pose around a finally beaten Loki and as Cap walks away, Tony remarks that the suit is doing “nothing” for Cap’s (truly great) butt. A teeny, tiny Ant-Man, sitting on Tony’s shoulder, represents all of our collective umbrage when he says, “That’s America’s ass.”  

Later, when Cap is forced to fight his far more upbeat, and dare I say, perky self, he ends up laying him out face-down on the floor. Our current Cap looks down at his prone body, pauses, reflects and says, “That is America’s ass.” And he is correct. It is 2019 and more than ever, we need a beacon of positivity and hope and self-love in these times of desperation. I’ll miss watching that blue/black clad perfection walking into danger on my screen, but I’ll remember it fondly and think of it whenever I need to look myself in the mirror and say “You know what, you can do this. Cap did it! And he complimented his own butt!” Let’s all celebrate our own butts the way we celebrate America’s.

Here’s to eight years of America’s Ass! Thank you for showing us the way. For being the the truest End of Endgame you could be. We salute you—past, present, and future.

Captain America First Avenger Punching Bag

Marvel Studios

 

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