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Final boss or ultimate loss? Twitter picks a side on this high-tech bed for gamers

By Benjamin Bullard
The Bauhutte Gaming Bed

Why lie about it? Sitting upright to play video games is gruelingly hard work. Keeping your spine erect while slogging through hours of calorie-burning up-leveling on your death run toward that final Zelda boss could be so much easier…if only, by Ganon, there were some better way. 

That’s evidently the thinking behind a new creation from Japanese company Bauhutte, which clearly doesn’t want gamers expending Deadpool amounts of maximum effort just to stay in the fight all day (and night) long. The company’s new gaming bed — a literal bed kitted out with all the ergonomic and convenience accoutrements that befit the 24-hour gamer — is aimed at players who see the evident benefit in slouching their way through those marathon Fortnite drop-in sessions. 

No stone appears to have been left unturned here in the goal of helping you stay recumbent on your next slow waddle through Untitled Goose Game (or even your next Sonic speed run). So, predictably, gamers on social media have been divided in their reactions since word of the new divan that’s devoted to digital dominance started making the rounds earlier this week.

Is a gaming bed the best thing to come along since fitted sheets? Or is it a sure-fire gateway to physical atrophy on a scale not seen since the invention of the bean bag? The Twitter reactions range from insightful to hilarious, but one thing’s for sure: gamers aren’t taking this bed business lying down:

Just a built-in toilet and hydration tube away from offering Idiocracy levels of sedentary convenience, the gaming bed comes with a desk, cupholder, shelving for snacks and accessories, a stay-in-place telescoping tablet clip, and a specially-molded elevated gaming pillow — so you don’t pull a neck muscle while trying so hard, like some Solid Snake in the grass, to lie perfectly still. 

Is it the wackiest thing we’ve seen? Well, it seems no crazier than the crowdfunded sensory-deprivation sack designed to make your small-screen movie watching more immersive; and at least it’s cheaper than the high-concept galactic décor in designer Kevin Cobonpue’s Star Wars furniture collection. We’re not even sure it’s the zaniest thing on Bauhutte’s own website. The company also sells (via PC Gamer) a “gaming camp” — a sort of see-through isolation cube that upright desktop gamers can surround themselves with — the better to keep the outside world at bay, if only by inches.

Whichever side of the gaming bed debate your opinion rests, rest assured: once you decide to make this thing the centerpiece of your setup, you’ve gotta be ready to fork over the gil (or rupees, or caps, or the gaming currency of your choice). If you buy every accessory, Bauhutte’s full suite of solipsistic gaming gear retails for 113,250 Yen — just a little more than $1,000. Sweet dreams!